Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Diabetes talk anyone??

  Hey everyone!! Is been so long I have been on here, been busy lately but now I have more time to post on here. Anyway! I've been thinking lately about how diabetes has affected my life in many ways yet made it better in other ways as well. The past few days I've experienced lows to the point I wasn't feeling half of my body. Which is not good at all and I do not know why or how that comes. It scares me that some days I'm not gonna wake up one of these days. No I'm not saying that I do not take care of my self because I do in so many ways than others and some people think I am not doing so just because I've experienced lows or highs for so many days in a row. How does that translate that I am not taking care of my self what so ever. Why can any one see how hard I try to take care of my self. How is it possible that everyone sees the bad but not the good I've done for my self. It makes me feel like I am not trying or doing my best at all, and it makes me feel like shit. Living with Diabetes is hard and stupid enough for others to tell me I am not doing my best enough to deal with Diabetes every day that I get scared I will not wake up one of these days at all. I feel like shit already just having Diabetes and dealing with it for people telling me I am not doing the best I can or that is not good enough what I do. Weather I do my best or not to manage my diabetes seems like is never enough to someone else.
   I am honestly scared that one day I will not wake up at all, and I do not ever want that to happen and hurt my family because of that. I hate having diabetes and dealing with it 24/7/365 its difficult dealing and managing it all the time. Some days I want to give it up but I don't because I want to see my loved ones one more time/day.